Page 268 – Cherwell

Cherwell’s Top 40 BNOCs

News

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8th May 2022

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Daniel Dipper

Second year, Magdalen

The Oxford Union may be a hornets’ nest of hacks, but Daniel has become a queen bee without destroying all likeability in the process. Working hard to improve access at the university, you will at least know him as the DJ who wished you a happy birthday on Facebook.

Anvee Bhutani

Second year, Magdalen

If you’re looking for the future President of the list, Anvee’s our best bet, having served as SU president and recently secured an officership in the Union. With connections in almost every society, she’s the BNOC’s BNOC.

You You Xue

First year, Merton

Instagram vlogger, restaurant owner, jetsetter, poker player, what is he not? You You is best known for his daily instagram stories. Discussing everything from good stock investments to Cherwell’s inability to grammar, You You’s stories read like a documentary. So, you should consider accepting the follow request he’s probably sent you.

Eve Bennett

Fourth year, Lady Margaret Hall

With 241k youtube subscribers tuning in for her studytubes, Eve is the only name on campus known by thousands off of it. After you got to Oxford, your friends probably asked whether you’d had an Eve sighting before finding out if you’d visited the RadCam.

Michael-Akolade Ayodeji

Third year, University College

Michael is about to join the limited number of students brave (or mad?) enough to serve as President of both Oxford Union and Student Union. He is also a much-loved member of Oxford’s American football team.

Tobias Schroder

First year MPhil, Exeter College

Tobias blew up OxRow after students across the uni fell in love with the Blues stroke. After leading the crew to victory over Cambridge in the men’s 176th Boat Race, Tobias’ tears of joy melted hearts the world over.

Tobias Schroder // Image Credit: AllMarkOne

Clay Nash

Third year, Brasenose

As SU LGBTQ+ Campaign Co-Chair, Clay is at the helm of social activism for LGBTQ+ rights. Hit up the next high-profile protest for your shot at an autograph.

Darcy Dixon

Third year, St Peter’s

Having featured as one of the Top 100 Future Leaders of Powerlist Magazine, and also delivered her own TedTalk, this woman’s LinkedIn page gave Cherwell an existential crisis. That being said, @Darcy, could you please accept my request? xx

Molly Mantle

Third year, St Hugh’s

Responsible for founding the Ban Conversion Therapy UK campaign, which gained national recognition, aged 15. Molly was the big boss of the Union last term, with her time as President overseeing significant financial reforms and new Equality and Access measures.

Charlie Hancock

Second year, Hertford

In Charlie’s own words, “some people arrive at Oxford with dreams of a Blue. I arrived wanting to edit Cherwell.” Having since been published in The Times and The Guardian, Charlie might well be spilling the tea on these BNOCs for many years to come.

Rachel Ojo

Second year, University

Rachel’s career is off to a flying start. Already a national campaigner working to prevent knife crime, she will likely be more influential than you could ever be. Watch this space.

Gracie Oddie-James

Second year, Christ Church

With a life motto like “give ‘em the old razzle dazzle”, it’s no surprise that Gracie is a big name on the Oxford drama scene. Keep an eye out for her on the big screen just so you can shout “I knew her from Oxford”, savouring that brief opportunity to remind your friends and family that you are, infact, an Oxonian.

Adam Roble

Second year, Teddy Hall

Yet another Oxford Union president, Adam is proof that once a BNOC, always a BNOC. He told us, “In the words of Kanye, everybody wanted to know what I would do if I didn’t get featured. I guess we’ll never know”. Editors’ note: Who wanted to know?

David Tritsch

First year MPhil, St Cross

David Tritsch is the BNOC of Cherwell, so he’s a BNOC of Oxford. Famous college family members include his wife Eve Bennett and his mum Malala. Catch him interviewing different students for the new installation of OxPops!

15. Alex Fish

Second year, Hertford

In his own words, Alex is a “Scottish guy that is for some reason involved in the Union”. One of the News Eds recently visited Glasgow and was amazed to discover he’s not just a BNOC but a BNIS (Big Name In Scotland).

Louis Jackson

Fourth year, Oriel College

Louis Jackson: the youngest winning rugby Oxford Men’s Blues captain in its 150-year history. That is some stat

Louis Jackson // Image Credit: Matt Impey

Fionn McFadden

Second year, Balliol

You’re probably sick of seeing Union hacks on this list, so here’s a hack from the other side. Fionn is secretary of the Oxford University Labour Club and a prominent activist involved with founding the ‘Balliol Community for Safety’.

Grace Olusola

Third year, St Catz

As the incoming Vice President of Welfare at the SU, Grace’s warm and bubbly personality around Catz might almost make up for the general absence of love and support we receive from this university. Also a writer and director on the Oxford drama scene, Grace is somewhat of a creative wizz.

Alfie Dry

Second year, St John’s

In his own words, Alfred is “Two for the price of one: by day, the famously masculine Alfred Dry and by night, the saucy teacher of your dreams – the one and only Miss Take”. Miss Take is just one of Oxford’s top two Drag Queens, but Rusty Kate (see p.19 in print) is probably too good for scrawled little lists like these.

Manon Johnes

Second year, St Catherine’s

Balancing both a full-time degree and a professional rugby career with Wales and Bristol Bears, Manon deserves more attention. She somehow lucked out with both the brains AND the brawn.

Amelia Standing

Fourth year, St Anne’s

Although her crew may not have taken victory, Amelia won our hearts as the captain of the Oxford Blues in the Boat Race against Cambridge. Broadcast on the BBC, hundreds of thousands lined up along River Thames… that’s BNOC multiplied by a thousand.

Orissa Welsh

Third year, Corpus Christi

Orissa is the blues hockey captain who led the team to Varsity success this year and kept them in the top BUCS league. Considering the stories we’ve all heard about the hockey team, we’re sure she’s a lot of fun.

Rachel Macnaghten

Third year, St John’s

Known as Rachel Macnaughty by the John’s porters, you might recognise the Classics student from the Wednesday Park End queue, as she is a frequent partier and club promoter. We’re sure there’s a story behind this bloody photo she sent us to publish, but it remains a mystery for now. Good advert for uni netball.

Noah Radcliffe Adams

Second year, St Peter’s

Noah is another resident of the Oxford stage, although he told us that he’s “not famous anymore”. We hope we can make up for his lack of celebrity status with this five seconds of fame.

Freddie zu Wied

Second year, Wadham

With Wilhelm zu Wied as his full name, we’re sure you won’t be surprised that Freddie is German nobility. In fact, according to his family’s website, “The clan of Wied is one of the most ancient noble families in Germany.” Despite this, Freddie is a legend in his own right, making friends with everyone on Holywell street from his window in his Covid freshers.

Walter and Simpkin

Exeter and Hertford

The protagonists of our favourite Oxford soap drama, these cats famously battle it out for the coziest spots in the college libraries. They are also the nemeses of the Cherwell News Team, because however good we think an article is, it will never get as many reads as a post about Waltkin. #TeamSimpkin

*Image: Nam Seongwook via @walter_the_exeter_cat*

Cherwell Editors-in-Chief

For anyone who thinks that we take ourselves very seriously at Cherwell, let this be your proof that yes, we do. And we think that you should, too. So here are our Editors- in- Chief, lovingly placed in 27th place, just below the college cats…

Andrew Smailes

Second year, Hertford

Notoriously tagged in every Oxfess about changing courses, this Hertford 2nd year changed from Chemistry to PPE. Also a former editor of the Oxford Blue, it’s proof that this is not a Cherwell PR exercise…

Oliver Dobbs

First year, Christ Church

In his own words: “You’ve really got to love this place to apply to it six times – and that’s what I did, making me the oldest fresher at Christ Church and earning me the moniker ‘Father of The House’. Don’t believe everything you hear about me – because most of it’s true.”

Sasha Mills

Third year, St Hugh’s

Sasha is another of the elite species of BNOC – a Big Name Of Cherwell. Thanks to her and Irene’s work rebranding us, Cherwell has entered a new age of rigorous and proper journalism… yes, BNOC lists.

Grace de Souza

Second year, Worcester

Hollywood, if you see this, Grace is ready. Oxford, if you see this, keep an eye out for Grace in the next blockbuster movie.

Lois Heslop

Third year, LMH

Lois co-founded the Oxford Blue– see, more proof it’s not all about Cherwell here! She also moonlights as a soprano in Queen’s Choir.

Luke Smith

Second Year Dphil

Luke is the captain of the Oxford Blues football team. Having worked his way through the education system with no A Levels, he is notable for putting in exceptional grind both on and off the pitch.

Julia Eden

First year, Hertford

This viral TikToker shot to fame after she posted a video with uncanny likeness to Prince Charming from Shrek. A former Bumble representative and a current Entz president, Julia’s videos are hugely boosting Oxford’s reputation by making it look a lot more fun than it actually is.

Dan Whiley

Second year, Wadham

The 2s hockey captain exudes E&M energy. But when he’s not nerding out on finance, he can be found around town donning flip flops whatever the weather.

Aivin Gast

Finalist, Somerville

Aivin made the news after naming a newly discovered galaxy structure ‘Alcyoneus’, having worked on the team that discovered it. In lesser news, he made the Cherwell team smile by admitting he only wanted to be on our list “to show my grandma”.

Fiona Zeka

First year, Hertford

A published author, and working with charitable organisations like Magic Breakfast, Brightside Mentoring, Zero Gravity and the Holocaust Educational Trust, Fiona has made this list by doing some exceptional work.

Leo Buckley

First year, Trinity

This is the man who flew to Ukraine in term time, and found himself stranded in the middle of a history-making war. He was also on the show Child Genius in 2010.

Enrico Pelganta

Second year, Christ Church,

As the President of Oxford’s Hayek Society, Enrico is personally responsible for the memorable scenes at ‘Kinks and Liberty’, their landmark social event.

Alex Foster

Second year, St John’s

“Small, ginger, Editor of the OxStu and OUDS C-lister” – his words, not ours. We would rather not have his name sully our highly reputable list, but the people have spoken, so here he is. Cherwell’s Top 40 BNOCs are not “accursed”.

Disclaimer:

The names and opinions in this list do not necessarily reflect or represent the views of Cherwell. Just a bit of fun.

Oxford nuclear fusion revolution: Cherwell meets the scientists

News

Humza Jilani

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8th May 2022

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Oxford nuclear fusion revolution: Cherwell meets the scientists

Oxfordshire is the epicenter of a global effort to harness the power of nuclear fusion, the process which powers the Sun, to greatly slash greenhouse gas emissions. And the University of Oxford is a leading player in that quest, with students and faculty partnering with and founding key players in seeking to develop a nuclear fusion reactor that can generate more energy than it consumes.

The Oxford community is the home of two startups, First Light Fusion and Tokamak Energy, developing pathways to commercially viable fusion energy. University of Oxford alumni are well-represented among their leadership teams. Both have raised millions of dollars from public and private investors, indicating a growing appetite worldwide for new approaches to solving the climate crisis.

Earlier this month, First Light Fusion, which spun out of the University of Oxford, successfully combined atomic nuclei through a novel approach called “projectile fusion.” A few months before, the Joint European Torus (JET) laboratory, which is located in Oxfordshire and is Europe’s most powerful fusion experiment, produced 59 megajoules of energy over five seconds, smashing its own world record for the amount of energy it can extract by squeezing together two forms of hydrogen.

As an energy source, nuclear fusion produces no carbon emissions and a very small amount of fuel could theoretically power a house for hundreds, if not thousands, of years. Fusion, however, remains prohibitively expensive and currently consumes more energy than it produces, making it commercially unviable for the near-term. Researchers, at Oxford and elsewhere, hope to crack the code to make it viable within the next ten to thirty years.

Cherwell spoke with a representative from the United Kingdom Atomic Energy Authority (UKAEA), a government fusion research organisation, who shared details about the almost century-long relationship between the University of Oxford and nuclear fusion research.

Chris D. Warrick, the student placement and outreach manager at UKAEA, shared that the Culham Centre for Fusion Energy, the United Kingdom’s national laboratory for fusion research, has very strong links to the University and its students. Each year, Culham places between 1 and 5 DPhil students from Oxford, as well as those from other universities, into its research organization.

“Our links [with the University of Oxford] are very strong, as are our links all over the U.K. and all over the world,” Warrick told Cherwell.

The University’s involvement in cutting-edge fusion research dates back to the late 1930s, when the Clarendon Laboratory housed a fusion research team. It trained generations of trailblazing fusion researchers, including Professor Peter Thonenmann, who received his DPhil from Oxford in 1946 and went on to build one of the world’s earliest nuclear fusion reactors called the Zero-Energy Toroidal Assembly (ZETA).

In 1965, the Culham Centre was founded in Oxfordshire. The location was chosen in part due to the decades-long involvement of Oxford researchers in fusion work, and it continues to collaborate closely with students and faculty from the University. The existence of the Harwell Science and Innovation Campus, which housed the Atomic Energy Research Establishment between the 1940s and 1990s, just south of Didcot also contributed to the decision to house the Culham Centre in Oxfordshire.

The Culham Centre collaborates closely with a variety of science, technology, engineering, and mathematics departments at the University of Oxford. They regularly draw on research into theories of plasmas from the Department of Physics. The Materials department assists Culham with designing approaches to creating a device that can reach temperatures that far exceed that of the surface of the Sun, and designing the reactor so that it can remain viable for up to 40 or 50 years, which is what they hope to one day achieve. Culham also works closely with the Mathematical Institute, the Engineering Science Department, and the Robotics Institute.

“Fusion research has long defied geopolitics, and Oxford’s role as a community of scholars from across the globe has facilitated collaboration throughout the Cold War and into the present day,” Warrick told Cherwell.

Image: EUROfusion / CC BY 4.0

Girls and Dolls: In conversation with A² Productions

Neily Raymond

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8th May 2022

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Girls and Dolls: In conversation with A² Productions

Fans of the hit comedy series Derry Girls, pay heed: the show’s creator, Lisa McGee, is also a playwright, and her striking debut play Girls and Dolls is coming to Oxford. We spoke with A² Productions about their experience of putting Girls and Dolls onstage.

Can you give me a spoiler-free summary of Girls and Dolls?

Alex Foster, producer: It’s set in 1980s Ireland, and it’s about two friends [Emma and Clare]. The first half is typical Derry Girls, with lots of colourful characters and comedy, but then it gets darker with the introduction of a new neighbour and her daughter. Clare gets an unhealthy obsession with the daughter, and things get darker from there – but if you want to find out just how dark, come and see the play!

Your creative team is bursting with people who are new to Oxford drama. Was this an intentional choice?

Alex: The choice was completely intentional. When we put the crew call out, we knew that we wanted to make a platform for new creatives. Obviously, one show can’t change everything overnight, but we’re hoping that people who come and see this are going to realise that you don’t have to stock the stage with people who have huge amounts of experience.

Emma Haran, ‘Emma’: I am a first year, so this is my first experience with Oxford drama. A friend of mine sent over the Facebook message about the audition, and I thought, why not give it a go? I have done drama before, at home, so it was exciting to give it a go with everyone here.

Sylvie Leggatt, ‘Clare’: I saw the previous play that A² put on last term [The Dumb Waiter, HT22] which was great. So when there was a casting call for actors that haven’t had a chance to get into Oxford drama – it can be a bit difficult – I was interested instantly, because it sounded perfect. Obviously, the show is incredibly intriguing, and it has been great fun.

Why did you decide to stage this show?

Alex: There are two main reasons: first, Derry Girls is funny as f**k. It’s a really, really good sitcom, and not only funny, but quite truthful about what it was like in 1980s and 90s Ireland. That’s half of it – Lisa McGee is not a name that you’d normally see in Oxford drama. We normally see Pinter, or Brecht, or a musical or something. There’s this idea that those are ‘proper’ theatre. But bringing in Lisa McGee makes it more accessible: if audiences find Derry Girls funny, they’ll find this funny, and if they find this funny, then they’ll want to get involved in Oxford drama. It’s not quite as intense as going through all the Stanislavskis and Brechts.

The other half of it is that history seems to be converging on this point. It’s been 25 years since Blair got elected for the first time. A year later, he sorted the Good Friday agreement, and that’s where the final episode of Derry Girls concludes. It feels like the right time to put something like this on. And it’s more of a right time because the new season of Derry Girls is now out!

How have you dealt with the political context of the play?

Bella Simpson, co–director: As with everything I do in terms of politics, it’s about being considerate of people and the facts of what happened. I think to stage something like this show, you have to be really aware of the different experiences that people went through, especially in Northern Ireland itself. I have Irish family history, so I was able to look to that, and one of our crew members has an Irish background as well. Incorporating the advice of people who have a personal connection to the story is really important.

Favourite line from the show: go.

Kaveri Parekh, co–director: “We love babies” – said mockingly. You have to come to the show to find out why that’s funny!

Why should we come and see Girls and Dolls?

Kaveri: I think the popularity of Derry Girls [demonstrates] that shows like this, with a good balance of witty humour and colourful characters, family dynamics and psychological insights, are the perfect blend to watch.

Bella: It educates, but it also entertains. I think that is very important.

Alex: After everything that OUDS has been through recently with worries about accessibility, and coming back after COVID, Girls and Dolls aims to look towards the future of what Oxford drama can be.

Girls and Dolls runs from the 10^th – 14^th May at Burton Taylor Studio. Tickets are available online here. Visit A² Productions on Instagram @asquaredprods.

Image credit: A² Productions.

Puzzles Answers TT22 Week 1

Culture

Ifan Rogers

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6th May 2022

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The answers for the puzzles in TT22 Week 1’s edition

Oxford Greens join ZEZ resistance

News

Oliver Hall

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6th May 2022

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The Oxfordshire Green Party have become the latest to speak out against the proposed expansion of the new Zero Emission Zone in Oxford’s City Centre next year. They have branded it as ‘greenwashing’ whilst others have criticised it as a new money-raising scheme in the middle of the cost-of-living crisis.

A pilot version of the scheme has been in operation since its launch in February and covers a small number of streets in the very centre of the city. Polluting vehicles are currently charged £10 a day to use these areas with some eligible for a discount and others a complete exemption.

The small pilot area has meant that so far most have been unaffected but this is set to change by the end of the year when the zone expands dramatically to cover the ‘wider city centre’. The maximum charge for petrol vehicles will also rise to £20.

Critics of the plan have highlighted that fully electric vehicles are currently out of the price range of the vast majority of consumers and argued that the plan disproportionately affects those already struggling with rising inflation and living costs.

The spokesperson for the Oxfordshire Green Party said: “The ZEZ is not a zero-emission zone but a congestion charge zone with discounts for low emission vehicles and other vehicle classes.” He went on to say that it has “little consequences for air quality” and that, “charging for access to the ZEZ is regressive, impacting on the poorest most whilst giving those with money the freedom to drive huge, polluting vehicles. All visiting vehicles should be treated equally regardless of the ability to pay.”

The programme has been developed by Labour since they took control of the local government but was first proposed by the Conservatives in 2015. Labour says: “We are learning from the ZEZ pilot ahead of the extension and will continue talking with and listening to businesses and citizens about the things we need to consider as part of the expansion.”

In contrast, the Conservatives are now opposed to the plan they originally proposed, stating, “To impose ZEZs at this time when we’re trying to recover from Covid and a cost-of-living crisis, reflects the fact we don’t have the leaders that Oxford deserves.”

The Liberal Democrats support the eventual roll-out of the plan but with some changes and after wider consultation.

The councillor Sajjad Malik stated: “The expanded ZEZ will make Oxford’s cost of living crisis even worse. The ZEZ should only expand when electric cars and vans are affordable to everyone. At present, electric vehicles are only affordable to the privileged few.

“This should be called a congestion zone rather than a Zero Emission Zone, because zero means no pollution or no vehicle. With this scheme, as long as you pay, you can drive any polluted vehicle. It’s a money-making excise in the name of environment.”

Image Credit: David Iliff/ CC BY-NC-SA 2.0

New research suggests that university reputation could matter less than final grade in determining earnings

News

Cecilia Catmur

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6th May 2022

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New research suggests that university reputation could matter less than final grade in determining earnings

New research by the Institute for Fiscal Studies (IFS) suggests that the reputation of the university a student attends could matter less than the grade of their final degree. In other words, a first-class degree from a less prestigious university could lead to better earnings than a lower grade from a more competitive one. The IFS suggests that students should focus less on how prestigious their university is and more upon their final grades.

The report finds that degree class has a huge impact upon future salaries. Generally, across all institutions, “earning differences between those graduating with different degree classes are large.” Higher degree classes offer significantly higher earning potential. A first-class degree compared to a 2:1 offers a 4% average pay increase for women and a 7% premium for men. A 2:2 instead of a 2:1 leads to a 7% decrease in earnings for women and 11% reduction for men.

Ben Waltmann, a co-author of the report, states, “many graduates who get a 2:2 from a highly selective university might have got a higher-paying job had they attended a slightly less selective university and got a 2:1.”

Degree class matters more than, or as much as, institutional reputation when looking at future earning potential. The gap in earnings between a 2:1 and a 2:2 is much more significant than the “inconsequential” difference between a first and a 2:1, Jack Britton reports. Research from 2013 shows that five years after graduation a 2:1 would earn a student (pre-tax) around £38,000 less than a 2:2.

The study also reveals these consequences in future salaries of a 2:1 compared to a 2:2 are greater at more selective universities. Those who achieve (regardless of gender) a 2:2 from the most selective institutions earn on average 20% less at age 30 than those with a 2:1. This compares to an average 6% salary decrease for women, and an 8% reduction for men, when comparing the same degrees at the least selective universities.

However, the rewards of improved degree classes do vary across subjects. A first class degree over a 2:1 offers significantly improved earning potential for subjects such as economics, law, business, computing, and pharmacology. Generally, within these subjects, degree class matters far more when related to future earnings. Those studying law or economics face a 15% decrease in earnings when achieving a 2:2 compared to a 2:1, whilst those who study education or English see “no significant difference” in earnings when comparing these degree classes, according to the report.

The statistics analysed also reveal large gender differences in the benefits of a first class degree on future earnings at the most selective universities. Whilst this top grade offers nearly no future pay benefit compared to a 2:1 for women, it offers an average 14% salary increase for men. This statistic reveals that high-achieving women have lower future earning potential than their male counterparts.

The report also finds a general long-term trend of universities awarding more students higher degree classes each year. The percentage of people who achieved first class degrees trebled in 2015 compared to 1999.

Selective universities award on average more of the top two degree classes each year than less selective institutions. However it is still harder to obtain these higher-class degrees from more competitive universities.

Image Credit: Steve Cadman/ CC BY-SA 2.0

Future of Mitre pub remains in the dark

News

Atticus Evans-Lombe

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6th May 2022

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The future of the historic Mitre, one of Oxford’s oldest and dearest establishments, remains unclear despite calls for Marston’s to reveal its plans. The much-loved pub, which was shut by Lincoln College in 2019 so that a multi-million pound development of student accommodation on the floors above could take place, has never reopened despite the refurbishments concluding in 2021.

When contacted by Cherwell, the bursar of Lincoln College, Alex Spain, suggested that responsibility for the pub’s future now lay with the brewery Marston’s, which currently owns the lease. However, he also said to The Oxford Mail (OM) that he is “optimistic that the Mitre will be open again very soon”.

It seems as though Marston’s is not so hopeful. Earlier this month, a spokesman for Marston’s told The OM, “we do not have any specific plans at this stage are currently reviewing options.”

This vague and inconclusive response has left locals in the dark and the future of the Mitre in doubt. In March, Dave Richardson of Campaign for Real Ale (CAMRA) told the OM that the chain’s inaction was leaving an “eyesore in the heart of the city” which was becoming “increasingly dilapidated”.

Further complaints have been made in connection to Marston’s relationship with major pub group Carlsberg, which people have argued have the funds to invest in a pub so central to Oxford locals.

Calls have also been made for Lincoln college to seek a new partnership with another company.

The pub can stake a claim to be Oxford’s oldest, tracing its roots back to the 13^th century, when several houses on the corner of the High and Turl Street were converted into an inn.

According to the Lincoln College website, students have called the site home since 1969, when the college first took over the upstairs accommodation.

Renovation work began in 2018 and was concluded last year, at the cost of £16 million. As well as being regular student accommodation, the College have opened the site for public stays outside of term-time, beginning this July, promising accommodation that combines “modern comfort with the charm and character of 17^th century Oxford.”

The future seems bright for the upper floors of the Mitre pub, then. Not so for the old tavern itself, whose future remains unknown. For now, a hole remains both right in the centre of the city and the hearts of many a local.

Image credit: Robin Sones/ CC-BY-SA/2.0

Breaking Bridge

Lifestyle

Hannah Lund

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5th May 2022

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CW: Sexual assault.

Women want to be able to look and feel good when going on a night out and not be sexually assaulted. Fun fact: the two actually are not mutually exclusive!

From a woman’s perspective, Bridge only has sexual assault strategies to tick security boxes and to keep their female customers coming. Bridge needs rules that would actually support and help their female customers, not exclude them further and in no way help the issue. Maybe starting with training their staff not to grab women…

After a long night bopping, I headed for the exit thinking only about whether I should get cheese or garlic mayo on my chips from McCoys. I asked the bouncers at the exit to open the metal gates so I could be let out, but not before one managed to get a firm feel of my firm behind, while I struggled to push this lump of a man off me. The issue wasn’t helped by the (at least four) other bouncers watching him who did not stop smiling or laughing for a second to get him off me. It is easier to be satirical, and I know it helps me to talk about it, but on a serious note I cannot see any way in which his action could be justified, and believe me, I have thought it through a lot. He was in a position of power, and abused that power by feeling up a drunk, alone girl.

Fast forward a few weeks and I had finally regrown my lady balls (and third year effort) enough to return to Bridge for a college bop. While ‘Bad Bitch Behaviour’ provides many superpowers, drunk bladder control is sadly not one, so I recruited my (male) friend to come to the toilet with me. Now I could have gone to the bathroom alone, however being alone in a club I was recently assaulted in didn’t really appeal to me. Pee complete, we returned to Spirit together to regain our status of ‘not-boring third years’, only to be immediately kicked out of the club by a male bouncer. Apparently, my friend and I were a threat to the people in Bridge as I could have been sexually assaulted by my friend. As you may know, there is no gender-neutral bathroom in bridge, so my options to feel safe and to go to the bathroom were limited.

I justified our joint toilet trip using ‘Grope-Gate’, only for the bouncer to reply, “well I’ve not heard about this so that doesn’t matter here”. Their resolution to the incident was to kick me out the club, with nobody else there or to walk home with none other than the man they said could have just abused me in the bathroom. That evening, Bridge said that my sexual assault, which occurred in their venue, “didn’t matter” and I was yet again put at risk and made to feel vulnerable by the actions of their staff. I get angry at the fact that Bridge act like the biggest threat to me in their venue is myself and my friends, rather than their own staff.

I work hard both physically and mentally to have a body that I feel confident in. So not only do I love feeling and looking drastically better than my mid-lecture, half-asleep state, but I also bloody love seeing my female friends out in the club looking confident too. Sequin covered tops. Short cut skirts. Low cut tops to get the ‘ladies’ out. High slit skirts which would make my Nanna say, “oh love, do you need to borrow a needle and thread?”. EXQUISITE. Nights out should be about being able to dress up however you want to and feel confident and safe enough to go out with friends, get a bit too tiddled and have fun. Half of the student body is excluded from this privilege, simply because they have so many more aspects of a night out to consider and worry about than most men.

Bridge does not actually care about how women are treated in their venue; they advertise these ‘protective’ strategies as a way to tick boxes and make women believe they are at a safe venue and continue to buy tickets. My truth is that Bridge could not give two hoots about the welfare and security of their female guests. Bridge needs to improve their security strategy, perhaps starting by teaching the people they hire what sexual assault is, and that women don’t actually want to be felt up by a random man. I do wonder if Bridge has surveyed female students to see what would actually make them feel safe and supported in a club.

I can guarantee that even I will be back in Bridge sooner or later, albeit glaring at the bouncers a little bit harsher and holding in a wee so I don’t get kicked out or left alone feeling unsafe. So, if you see me bopping in my favourite low-cut top and trousers that fit *just right*, just know it is a very strong act of feminism.

Unai Emery – The perennial over-achiever loved by Europe and rejected by England

Sport

Oliver Hall

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3rd May 2022

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Unai Emery – The perennial over-achiever loved by Europe and rejected by England

Three Europa League trophies in a row with Sevilla, a domestic treble at Paris Saint-Germain, and yet another European triumph with unfancied Villareal over the giants of Manchester United last season. Unai Emery’s 11 trophies have earned him adoration across the continent but here in England fans still mock him as the man who ‘failed’ at Arsenal, despite the fact that he missed out on Champions League football by just one point in 2018/19. So, what more does the enigmatic Spaniard have to do to earn the appreciation of football’s most inward-looking fan base?

In the end, he only lasted six months in North London. There is no doubt that expectations were for more but his tenure was one defined by fine margins. Sinking to fifth on the final day of the season, behind rivals Tottenham, was certainly disappointing for Arsenal fans, but in hindsight, subsequent seasons have shown that that may well have been a fair ceiling for the club at the time. What is more, he managed to negotiate the notoriously gruelling Europa League schedule and lead the Gunners to their first European final since 2003.

And no one would blame Emery for never wanting to return to management in the Premier League. In his time in England, he was routinely mocked for his accent by fans and pundits alike, criticised for transfer decisions that were out of his hands and presented with a squad that lacked cohesion and any kind of real identity. Never given the opportunity to build the side in his image like his much-lauded successor Mikel Arteta, the board hung him out to dry as the scapegoat for their various failings.

His rejection by English football couldn’t contrast more with his reception on the other side of the Channel. Here, he maintains a reputation as one of the most meticulous and dedicated managers on the planet, with stories of his match preparation for his side’s Champions League tie against Liverpool serving as the perfect example – he spent four days at the training ground studying the Reds, watching some 15 games in their entirety and picking them apart as he constructed his game plan. Those who have played under him only echo these sentiments with Joaquín, who played under the Spaniard at Valencia, remarking, “Emery put on so many videos I ran out of popcorn! He’s obsessed with football – it’s practically an illness.”

It isn’t just his attitude though – his achievements with unfancied smaller sides, especially in Europe, have been nothing short of extraordinary over the years. At Sevilla, he won the Europa League three times in a row, knocking out the likes of Valencia, Fiorentina, and Liverpool in the process. At PSG too he far from underachieved, domestically at least, winning seven trophies in two seasons.

This season though may represent his most impressive European odyssey yet. He has managed to steer Villareal, a side with a budget a fraction of the size of most in the competition, to the semi-finals of the Champions League. Along the way, he has stunned two of the continent’s super clubs with Juventus and Bayern Munich both left outplayed and well beaten by the Yellow Submarine.

So, the question now is what does he have to do to convince English fans? In reality, I doubt he really cares. A dramatic comeback against Jurgen Klopp’s Liverpool may seem unlikely in tonight’s semi-final second leg but his reputation in La Liga will remain nothing short of sky-high. Going forward, a return to PSG has been much talked-up and he has long-held aspirations of trying his hand at Serie A. However, few can deny that Emery is at his best at smaller clubs he can mould in his image when he is backed by a reliable board, as a result few would blame him if he chooses to stay away from the world’s biggest clubs for the foreseeable future. For now, the Spaniard is quite content at Estadio de la Cerámica and he will look to build on this year’s European success again next season, domestically and abroad.

Image: Aleksandr Osipov, CC BY-SA 2.0, via Wikimedia Commons

Sisu and the forest roads to success: How Finland has dominated world motorsport

Sport

Alex Tennant-Holder

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3rd May 2022

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Sisu and the forest roads to success: How Finland has dominated world motorsport

If you’ve ever watched competitive racing or delved into the history of motorsports, you’ll likely have observed an interesting, albeit strange, pattern. Among the many thousands of professional drivers over the years across many different racing disciplines, a great number of them hail from a small, sparsely-populated Scandinavian nation that is not often discussed within the sphere of world sporting success outside of those sports which rely upon the use of engines or snow.

Listed as the ‘happiest country in the world’ as per the annual World Happiness Report, Finland is a country that I have been lucky enough to visit several times since a young age. It is a place of immense natural beauty, piercingly cold winters, and home to a population of straight-talking people (the name Kimi Räikkönen springs to mind!) who especially enjoy the outdoors and are seemingly unafraid of the elements. Finland’s land mass is 39% larger than that of the United Kingdom but its population pales in comparison; with only 5.55 million people living there as of 2022 as opposed to the UK’s 68.53 million. Outside of the largest cities such as Helsinki and Tampere which are mostly situated in the more naturally hospitable Southern half of the country, Finland’s landscape consists largely of vast swathes of woodland that are interspersed with over 187,000 lakes. In the words of Kimi: “Bwoah.”

Famous exports of Finland have included globally-popular tech products such as Nokia phones, wildly successful mobile games like Angry Birds and Clash of Clans, the very palatable Fazer chocolate, and much more. However, it has also produced some of the very greatest racing drivers both today and in the last several decades. From Formula 1 greats Mika Häkkinen, Kimi Räikkönen and current Alfa Romeo driver Valtteri Bottas, to the legends of rally racing such as Juha Kankkunen and Tommi Mäkinen, the prevalence of Finnish drivers in the highest echelons of the motorsport world is something that no motosport fan or even novice observer can ignore.

So what is it that gives the Finns such talent behind the wheel? Such a question, of course, has no single answer, but there are perhaps a few principal pistons that form the backbone of the Finnish racing engine.

The first and arguably most unique of these components, is the Finnish concept of sisu. A Suomi term, this concept is hard to define, and indeed many Finnish people will say that it has no true English equivalent. However, it might most easily be understood as a spirit of ‘guts’, ‘courage’, or ‘determination’. Many years ago, during the golden era of pre-punch Top Gear, Mika Häkkinen explained it to James May as such: “Climbing a tree and jumping down from there, that doesn’t mean sisu. That is not courage. Sisu we can very much relate to in motor racing. For example, you’re driving a rally car in a forest extremely, really fast, and you need courage to be able to brake late, to go on the throttle really early, to go really close to the apex of the corners.”

‘Courage’ is quite apt in capturing the basic essence of sisu; but seems to serve as an oversimplification. If you haven’t already, I highly recommend watching some Finnish rally driving – when you come back, you will likely agree that ‘courage’ is not quite the whole picture. Drivers launch their cars into corners, they fly over bumps, slide their wheels over gravel roads and try to avoid the many people on the side of the track whipping their heads around to follow them, who are also quite possibly the bravest (or craziest?) spectators in the sporting world. At 2021’s Rally Finland competition – dubbed the ‘Grand Prix of Rallying’ – drivers clocked an average speed of 123kph on narrow gravel roads. At those kinds of speeds, one mistake can prove fatal; and yet, the Finns have perfected the art of pushing themselves and their cars to the limits in a way that some Finnish people have translated as ‘going beyond one’s own abilities’, leaving no room for fear to produce extremely costly errors, or, even worse in their eyes, slow laps.

The surroundings and environment of Finland are also a key factor in explaining how Finnish drivers have had so much sporting success in relation to the country’s size. Due to the routine envelopment of asphalt roads with thick snow each winter and the reliance upon rural gravel roads in order to get around, many Finnish people learn to drive cars in different terrains by practicing on quiet tracks from extremely young ages. It is not uncommon for children to regularly partake in woodland racing events, or learn to control slides on Finland’s many frozen lakes.

The national driving test system is also among the strictest in the world, with drivers required to have completed at least 18 hours of formal instruction (including a mandatory spell on ice) as well as 19 theory lessons – prior to the two tests – in order to receive their interim licence and legally drive on public roads. If that wasn’t enough, they must take a second test after two years in order to gain a full licence. If you’ve experienced the British driving test (or indeed most countries’ tests), you’ll appreciate just how demanding this system is; and it’s therefore no wonder that most Finnish drivers’ base qualifications and abilities seem far better than those found elsewhere.

In conjunction with the collective sisu spirit, Finnish society has created a special place for motorsports in its culture which enables all kinds of people, both old and very young, to participate in the sport and enjoy the communities and opportunities that it provides. ‘Folk racing’ is a popular pastime in Finland, which involves local people using inexpensive vehicles (often capped at a value of €1,000) to race one another at small gravel circuits all over the country. Racing is in many nations viewed as an upper-class sport that excludes the majority of those who have an interest in it on the grounds that they cannot afford to procure, modify and maintain cars or track fees, but Finns have lowered the barriers to entry and transformed it into an accessible activity that everyone can take part in, whatever their ability. Those that do particularly well are sometimes lucky enough to enter the professional racing world, while others are able to enjoy the sport for its own sake without breaking the bank.

Accessibility within motorsport is something that most fans agree should be improved upon significantly (the overall costs of becoming a Formula One driver, for example, is said to run into the tens of millions of dollars), and although the inherent costs of the sport will always be a barrier to some, perhaps we should take more heed of the way in which the Finnish people have helped to open up the activity to as broad a demographic as possible. Indeed, how can a nation truly discover its greatest potential champions, if its youngest and brightest talents are never given the opportunity to develop themselves?

Motorsport is to Finland, as the NFL is to America or cricket might be to India. It both informs and is informed by the nation’s culture, serving as a product of the development of the society in which it exists. Finland’s reputation for all things mechanical following its independence from Russia in 1917 as it developed its own economy and identity brought it great success in industry and manufacturing; it naturally followed that this love for engineering combined with the country’s unforgiving environment and sisu spirit to produce a place for its citizens to thrive behind the wheel.

Say what you will about the brilliance of Brazil’s Senna, Austria’s Lauda, the strength of the Spanish Sainz racing lineage or the many talents of Scottish drivers – in any case, the Finnish have truly carved a place for their nation in the history of all things motorsport, and they’re showing no signs of slowing down.

Image Credit: Sarah Vessely / CC BY SA-4.0 via Wikimedia Commons

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Unai Emery – The perennial over-achiever loved by Europe and rejected by England

Sisu and the forest roads to success: How Finland has dominated world motorsport

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