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Devising a travel novel that people actually want to read is tough. It’s clearly necessary to communicate the great and the good; the bad and the ugly, sure. However a discourse that is solely descriptive, even in beautiful prose, can get tedious. ‘What I did on my holidays’ is nice enough for an article, but downright dull for a book. Nico Hobhouse, a second-year Classicist at Trinity, is therefore wise in his attempt to marry colourful description with spirited polemic in his self-published book Dancing on the Frontier: Travels by Land through China and Tibet.
Dullness is absolutely not Hobhouse’s problem. Some randy passages hit you like a bus, especially since they come from nowhere. Fresh from describing a Buddhist monastery in Tibet, Chapter 11 takes a sudden and inexplicably lewd turn: “Down one narrow alley I spotted two donkeys rutting. The female seemed less eager and pulled away. The male trotted after her, his member still primed to go…The poor jenny was having a rough day.” These entertaining but stand-alone remarks are far from atypical. More than once the reader is thrown off the scent of what he thinks is an emerging theme by a slightly wacky observation.
The paragraphs are short and fairly punchy; it is an easy read (mostly: I confess to having to look up ‘somnolent’) though the images Hobhouse evokes are nonetheless vivid and varied. However the overall effect is diminished by numerous typos and an episodic structure that leaves the passages disjointed. And once in a while the language is a bit clumsy: in one instance he suggests that the ‘lack of [political] openess in China…is as alive as ever.’ Can an absense of something be alive? Probably not. It’s one of the areas in which self-publishing – otherwise a fantastic blessing for first-time authors – falls down.
The typical passage – which provides an original story followed by a fascinating insight – works well. There is a well-scripted section about his experience of the visceral antipathy felt by otherwise sophisticated Chinese urbanites against the Japanese. Staying in Nanjing, the sight of a brutal massacre at the hands of Imperial Japan in 1937, Hobhouse movingly describes the sensation of Western guilt as “more powerful that disgust at what I saw. I felt ashamed that I had not known about the incident before I had come to China. The scale and horror of the massacre were comparable to the Holocaust and yet I had never really cared back home in England.”
Occasionally though the formula breaks down; the weakest parts of the book generally crop up when it does. Anecdotal, albeit unusual, tit bits are used to draw predictable and not especially profound conclusions: “I saw two toads copulating – a reminder that early spring was approaching – and reflected that nature was losing out in a big way to China’s urbanisation.” Ew. Is this really what Hobhouse, observing the amphibian fornication, thought at the time? Or is he indulging in a bit of post hoc analysis that matches up his travelling experiences to the well-established assertions commonly bandied about in The Economist?
By contrast the strongest sections occur when he is more modest in his ambition. Sharing a minibus, with an elderly monk, trundling through Tibet Hobhouse recounts the monk’s contradictory behaviour. “The senior of the two took out some prayer beads…[A]fter chanting for a long time he took a few swigs from his bottle of water. When he had finished, to my astonishment, he casually tossed the empty bottle out of the window. He had a fake Tissot wristwatch…and a mobile phone on which he took my photo.” The reader does not need to be explicitly told what Hobhouse is implying: that the monk’s contradictions betray a disconcerting truth about modern China. The effect is immensely satisfying.
One final groan: Hobhouse clearly takes his liberalism seriously. From Bautou to Beijing, Shanghai to Lhasa, he strikes up an argument about the virtues of Western democracy vs. authoritarian capitalism with just about every poor chap he meets. Each time he presents the dispute fairly crudely, though given the fact that he had to conduct these Socratic dialogues in Mandarin we can forgive him for that. The issue is rather that when it comes to the book he keeps banging on about it without saying anything new each time. Travelling alone, off the beaten track, meeting bucolic village folk who had perhaps never spoken to a white man before, Hobhouse’s account really should have been stronger in explaining how China understands itself, as well as the world it will shortly dominate.
Yet the final result is really quite impressive. Hobhouse has taken a year of his life that is tough to characterise in any one definitive way, and has turned it into a thoroughly readable, thoughtful and playful journal. Were he to write a second travel book, as I am told he is planning to, I suspect he would avoid most of the mistakes made in Dancing on the Frontier. Through it Hobhouse has nonetheless cultivated an authentic tone and an inquiring style that will serve him well into the future.
‘Dancing on the Frontier’ is published by Xlibris. A paper copy can be purchased through Amazon or alternatively as an eBook through W.H.Smith
10. Clean bed sheets! That fateful decision in 7th week to hold off on the laundry ‘since I’ll be home next week anyway’ will by 8th week be inflicting nasty repercussions. Your clothes smell. Your sheets smell. And you smell. Turning those socks inside out just won’t do the trick.
9. No early morning fire alarms. Unless there’s a fire.
8. The local café doesn’t serve anything with soya milk. They’ve never even heard of it. The coffee is strong and the sandwiches actually have filling. You don’t leave feeling peckish. Pret A Manger this is not.
7. Fighting against your younger siblings over what to watch on TV is much easier than attempting to prize the remote off the rugby players in the JCR staring gormlessly at the female presenter on Sky Sports News.
6. Breakfast, lunch and dinner are whenever you want them.
5. You feel clever again. Never mind that you scraped a 2.2 in collections and spent most of term amalgamating Wikipedia articles and SparkNotes into your essays. To friends and family back home, you’re seriously smart. People listen up when you air an opinion during Question Time and when a situation demands mental arithmetic, all eyes land of you expectantly.
4. Getting away from friends. You miss people, right? Well not really, not for the first couple of weeks at least. In fact it’s a relief to get away. Thrown together immediately and intimately, by 8th week your neighbour is starting to irritate you with his bathroom habits and the guy/gal you had flirted with meaninglessly is starting to hang around like a bad smell. Home = solitude.
3. Your cup of tea doesn’t taste like pond water. The North-West has famously soft water, making for a smashing brew, but regardless of where ‘home’ is, the water has got to be better than the cloudy, chemically-molested rubbish that the taps chunder out in Oxford.
2. Books hanging around on windowsills and table tops include: Mary Berry’s Baking Bible, Bear Grylls’ Born Survivor and an overly worn copy of Fifty Shades of Grey. NOT Nicomachean Ethics, The Faerie Queene or the Oxford Handbook of Quantitative Methods.
1. You can sleep during the day without hating yourself afterwards. Back home spontaneous naps are entirely legit. If you wake up and still feel a bit drowsy then you can sleep some more without having to check the time. Bliss.
“You’re building me a funeral parlour with these flowers – I’m suffocating.” Madame cries as she returns home to find her Kitsch room bedecked with gladioli. And indeed the spectators of Chris Adams and Anna Koch’s powerful adaptation of The Maids find themselves equally enmeshed in a web of string-taught flowers and gilded mirrors, gaudily coloured bedspreads and luxurious dresses.
These very items are symbols of what Jean Genet, controversial French playwright and author, considered the oppressiveness of opulence, which Madame, played by the phonetically masterful Alice Porter, is the embodiment of as well as Solange and Claire’s obsession. The two sisters are played by Zoe Bullock and Hannah Gliksten respectively, and are perfect as monsters of self-loathing, slippery identity, and pervasive paranoia, straining under the pressure of a self-imposed mission of murder, and a mistress saccharine and melodramatic – a constant caricature of herself, who doesn’t even know, as Genet himself put it, “the extent to which Madame is playing Madame”.
The play – its insular, effectively maddening one-track plot of maids seeking freedom and revenge through the assassination of their insufferable mistress excepted – presents a complexity which the three actresses and the Koch/Adams duo have clearly perceived. Solange is far more than a bullish, bullying murderess; she is also the life-deprived older sister, desperate to protect and free the younger Claire, profoundly resentful of what her social status has made them both endure.
Claire is more than the domineering, jeering executor of most of their risky plan (the audience is made to understand she has forged letters of accusation to place Monsieur, Madame’s lover, in prison). She is also the self-doubting brunt-bearer of much of Solange’s hysterical blame-laying, and the inhumanly brave precipitator of the play’s startling (if you’re discovering it for the first time) denouement. Similarly, Porter’s carefully put-together rendition of Madame fortunately sidesteps the trap of extravagance and consequent implausibility inherent to the character, and presents us with a very subtly nuanced performance.
The play’s unfolding demonstrates a highly creative use of set and props. The former is quite small and square, with a three-sided audience front, allowing a proximity which only adds to the riveting intensity of the action. The impressive web of string woven above and around the spectators contains what the sisters see as the objects denouncing their guilt – a disconnected telephone, a buzzing radio, a poison-laden tea-table, the despotic alarm-clock, and the dozens of bouquets. On the threshold between a twisted fantasy bordering on the incestuous, and a sordid tale of personality confusion and self-revulsion, The Maids is a great piece of student drama, complete with stellar cast, inspired direction and production, and intelligent design.
A word of warning: for those who will struggle beneath the play’s leaden atmosphere and high decibel level, know that the actresses are working with something that is infamously characteristic of Genet, and that, if anything, they transcend it with the force and stamina of their performances.
FIVE STARS
‘You have to have a funny story!’
‘A funny story?’
‘Yep – you have to have a great conversation opener on a first date that makes him think you are just the most entertaining, gorgeous person in the world.’
(Oh god. It’s going to have to be on the rib-cracking side of the hilarity scale in that case.)
‘I don’t have a funny story.
‘Make one up then.’
I know what you’re thinking… crazy, right? Don’t do it. Very, very stupid idea!
Well all I can say is that I wish I had because what ensued was nothing short of a nightmare. I think the pressure of having to come across as some kind of Helen-of-Troy-Michael-McIntyre combo got the better of me, and instead of making up a funny (yet endearing) anecdote, I got confused and unleashed the truthful and humiliating fury on myself.
The formalities were over, drinks were in hand, and I’d managed to keep it together so far (even I can handle the ‘Hey!-How-are -you-doing?’ bit).
‘So, what have you got up to this week?’
Now that is a normal question if ever I heard one. So why the hell could I not come up with something normal in return?
Before I could stop myself, I heard the words ‘Well, it’s funny you should ask…’ drop from my mouth. NO! No. It’s not funny! It’s really not at all.
‘We had our Christmas Bop last weekend and I was rocking [oh my god, I just said ‘rocking’] the most amazing costume!’
I was having an out-of-body experience: Sane Me beating the glass bubble surrounding my Inner Freak screaming, ‘Please shut the fuck up!’
But no, Inner Freak was on a roll…
‘Yeah, I decided to cover myself in chocolates and sweets [is that even a costume?!], except I got sooooo drunk at pre-drinks that I passed out in my corridor…’
…and just one more nail in the coffin lid:
‘And when I woke up in the morning, all the chocolate had melted and it looked like I’d shat myself.’
Hilarious. Call me?
He didn’t.
With their debut CD last year earning them widespread critical praise, Oxford’s most recent choral foundation has a lot riding on their shoulders. The Choir of Merton College proves that this reputation is deserved with a range of repertoire spanning between the fourteenth-century and some of today’s leading composers.
From the opening Matthew Martin setting Ecce concipies, Merton demonstrate their characteristic clarity of sound. The rhythmic vitality and energy which is present for the rest of the CD is established from this very first track. The opening soprano idea gradually broadens both texturally and registrally, building to a tumultuous apotheosis before fading back to nothing. The blend is impressive for such a young ensemble (particularly in Howard Skempton’s O Sapientia), although some prominent vibrato within the soprano section occasionally disturbs this.
Benjamin Nicholas’ conducting invites dramatic realisations from the choir, elucidating a range of moods, dynamics and tone colours from the singers. A particular highlight was James MacMillan’s Advent Antiphon. As in the later Ä’riks Ešenvalds, the soloist is drawn from within the choir: in this case, tenor Christopher Watson. The Delphian recording allows Watson’s voice to catch the resonant acoustics of Merton Chapel to poignant effect, lingering over the portamenti which ornament the elegiac melody. This resonance suits the spacious soundworld created by Peter Phillips. This is particularly effective in Ecce Virgo Concipiet, with the legato sound in contrast with the earlier piece of Byrd (Rorate caeli desuper).
The central part of the CD is the Seven Magnificat Antiphons commissioned for the Merton Choirbook (part of the college’s impending 750th anniversary). Uniting such names as Gabriel Jackson, John Tavener and Cecilia McDowall, each anthem celebrates a different aspect of the coming Christ. These 7 pieces test the choir to their limits, but they rise to the challenge: the angular soprano lines of the Tavener are bridged smoothly and the synchronised ornaments in Gabriel Jackson’s O Clavis David brought off with ease. The choir seem to be more comfortable with the forte end of the dynamic spectrum: points in Cecilia McDowall’s O Oriens could benefit from a touch more support.
Anna Steppler’s two interludes bookmark these Seven Magnificat Anthems, showcasing the chapel’s neo-classical Walker organ. The Praetorius sees ornaments seamlessly integrated into the flowing chorale, while Heiller’s adaptation of the Advent chorale Es ist ein Ros’ entsprungen sees her explore the instrument’s different registral colours.
Such a selection of repertoire allows the Choir of Merton College to demonstrate their technical and expressive capabilities. With impressive blend and range of tones, Merton shows that their relative youth is no barrier to top-class performances. As their 750th anniversary approaches, the choir is definitely going from strength to strength.
What do No Country for Old Men, True Grit and The Big Lebowski all have in common? One word: Coen. Previously referred to as ‘The Two-Headed Director’ the Coen brothers have become synonymous with movie success. Their trophy cabinet includes 3 Oscars for ‘No Country for Old Men’, a BAFTA, a Director’s Guild Award and 2 Writer’s Guild Awards. Suffice to say if you see these two on the billing, the producers mean business. The expectations were high. Unfortunately expectations were dashed rather quickly. Let me explain:
Gambit is a remake of a film of the same name from 1966 starring Shirley MacLaine and Michael Caine. The plot has been altered slightly, as has the cast with rumours Jennifer Aniston was due to play PJ Puznowski rather than Cameron Diaz, (lucky escape for her). The film begins with a voiceover from the slightly eccentric Major Wingate played by twice Oscar-nominated Brit actor Tom Courtenay. It transpires that Wingate and art curator Harry Deane are planning to con detestable businessman Lionel Shahbandar into the purchase of a fake Monet however, they need the help of Texan cowgirl PJ Puznowski as ‘the convincer’.
It is from this point really that the film becomes anything but convincing. There’s a sense of old fashioned caper about it which is endearing at first but soon wears thin. The English nature of the film led by Firth and Rickman leads to one round of ‘oh blimeys’ and buffoonery too many and our brilliant writers resort at one point to flatulence to get a laugh. This is unfortunate as there is scope for a very entertaining comedy particularly from the performance of Alan Rickman who plays the odious Lionel Shahbandar, the sort of boss many are sure to be able to identify with. Then we’ve got Diaz who seems to be on rather a bad run of late with What To Expect When You’re Expecting and Bad Teacher. She definitely makes the most of a limited situation but rather than provide amusement, her tacky American PJ clashes with Firth’s blundering Harry rather like Shrek the Third against The King’s Speech, the effect of which is quite uncomfortable.
The sad aspect to this film is that it’s hard to watch the cast diluting their capabilities down to the levels of nudity and karaoke. Diaz is 4 times Golden Globe nominated for the likes of Vanilla Sky and Being John Malkovich. Just last year Firth swept the Oscars for his legendary performance in The King’s Speech and Rickman has a habit of cropping up in huge, brilliant movies like Hitchhiker’s Guide to the Galaxy and Alice in Wonderland not to mention etched his place in movie-eternity as the despicable Severus Snape.
As for the Coens it just goes to show that for all their quirk and individuality, heist comedy is not a shoo-in, even for these guys. The brother’s other project Inside Llewyn Davis is currently in post-production. This is a star-studded affair including the likes of Carey Mulligan (An Education), John Goodman, Justin Timberlake and Garrett Hedlund (Tron). This might be a reason for the slightly rushed, between-productions-filler feel to Gambit. Either way, despite the potential of this film it’s not the Coen’s best. Better luck next time boys.
3 STARS
Breakbeat musician A. Skillz and Radio One DJ Rob Da Bank have been announced as the headliners for this year’s Varsity Trip.
Cam FM’s Tim O’Brien will be the first to take to the stage at the Fire and Ice themed opening party and will be followed a DJ set from The Correspondents and leading act, A. Skillz.
“Twisted Circus”, the final night party will feature Varsity Trip Ents competition winner, Oxford student and producer, Day One who will be followed by a DJ set provided by the NME award winning White Lies. DJ Krafty Kuts will then precede headliner Rob Da Bank.
Other entertainment during the week includes the opening of VarCity, with award winning beat-boxer, Faith SFX and a comedy night which will be hosted by Matt Lacy of ‘Gap Yah’ fame and headlined by Sean Meo and Paul Foot.
William Sheldon, Varsity Trip 2012 Entertainments Director said, ‘The Varsity Trip Opening and Closing nights are set to be absolutely amazing. We feel privileged to be hosting such talented artists, who will be providing an incredible soundtrack to both nights. For each night the venue will be transformed, first into an extreme melting pot of Fire and Ice, and then into the wild and wicked Twisted Circus.”
He added, “With some surprises awaiting every participant these nights will be the biggest and best parties of the Oxbridge calendar.’
First year PPE-ist at Keble College, Emma Alexander said, “It seems like a great line-up, given that they won’t have had an unlimited budget, with a nice amount of variety too. The main complaint I’ve heard from people is that White Lies are appearing but only doing a DJ set. Having Matt Lacey of Gap Yah fame there for Comedy Night should be particularly amazing, and I think we were all glad that Oxford-based Day One won the ents vote to play on the Opening Night.
“Generally, I’m so excited for the trip and it’s going to be a great way to let off steam after a strenuous first term.”
Water levels in Oxford are continuing to rise after days of heavy rainfall.
Flooding has occured across several areas of the city overnight and this morning, with Christ Church Meadow, and Magdalen’s Water Meadow now under water. Wolfson’s punt harbour is similarly submerged.
Flood warnings were put in place late on Monday evening for the River Cherwell and its tributaries in Oxford. As of 1pm on Tuesday, the Environment Agency has declared 23 flood warnings and 53 flood alerts in force, including the River Cherwell for the Oxford area.
In a press release, the Environment Agency stated, “Rainfall is now dropping off across the South East and is forecast to remain low for the next few days, however rivers are still responding to the heavy rain of the past week.
“Although the rain has eased off, and stopped in some parts of the South East, the risk of flooding is still real. After several days of heavy rain the ground is saturated and flood water from small watercourses is flowing into larger rivers like the Thames. River levels will continue to rise in the foreseeable future before they start to go down.
“Levels remain high on the river Cherwell in the Oxford area and the Environment Agency is warning residents in Reading and Oxford to be prepared over the coming days. Demountable defences have been deployed to protect properties in parts of Oxford including Abingdon Road, East Street, Vicarage Lane (Grandpont) and at Osney Island. The defenses at Osney protect up to 75 properties and 30 properties at Vicarage Lane.”
Magdalen student Aileen Brennan commented, ‘The floods arent affecting us too badly – its just our grounds and sports pitches that are underwater. ‘Water meadow’ is finally living up to its name. Most of us are quite happy – we now have a deer park AND a lake. Beat that Worcester’.
The Abingdon Road has been closed from Folly Bridge, and as a result Oxfordshire County Council has suspended its ban of private traffic through Oxford’s high street in to accomodate the closure. The front page of Tuesday’s Oxford Mail claimed that 10,000 homes in Oxfordshire are now at risk of flooding, and homes in West Oxford have been evacuated this morning.
Officers from the County Council and the Fire and Rescue Services spent the night working to help residents affected by the flooding. Pumps are being used to try and remove the water, and an emergency centre has been set up in Blackbird Leyes.
The flooding follows days of increasing river levels. The forecast is for more heavy rain in Oxford on Tuesday afternoon, although with a drier day on Wednesday.
The Council are advising people to keep checking the Environment Agency’s flood warning pages. Their website states, “It is possible that some householders will be advised to leave in the next 24 hours. If this happens, you will be advised by members of the emergency services or council staff who will visit homes door to door”.
In an email to the JCR, Hertford’s Bursar Dr Andrew Beaumont said, ‘At this time, there is no immediate cause for concern: and as the long-term weather forecast is for several days of dry weather… hopefully this will allow for the present flooding to subside’ but noted the college would ‘endeavour wherever possible to assist [students’] departure at the end of term.’
However, for students, the greatest impact has been on rowing. Boathouse Island was closed on Saturday until further notice, and Christ Church Meadow is now largely underwater.
In urgent telephone calls to captains, OURCs advised boat clubs to prepare boathouses for flooding, and to move all equipment well above ground level. They warned students not to “try and rescue boats while putting your own life in danger!”.
The advice follows the cancellation of Christ Church regatta and the Isis Winter League. Last week, a Somerville novice crew crashed and a non-rowing boat was overturned at Osney Lock in dangerous stream conditions.
This is the culmination of a difficult term for rowers. There have been weeks of river closures, and students have expressed concern that rowing beginners will be deterred from the sport.
Whitney Wells, a visiting Stanford student, was disappointed but determined to keep rowing: “The regatta being cancelled was definitely sad for all the novices. We’d worked hard to train together as a team leading up to the regatta, especially trying to make up for lost river time from the red flags all term.
“I’ve been really appreciative of how our captains have stayed enthusiastic despite the stress of having to cancel outings all term. It has definitely been frustrating, but hopefully next term the river will be calm enough for outings”.
Some took an even more positive line. David Fidgett, men’s captain at Corpus Christi, commented, “I think it’s good for rowing. The river’s increased in size making it accessible to more people. At Corpus, you can practically row to and from breakfast now”.
After Merton’s recent decision to adopt a tapir, it looked like the traditional college tortoise had had its day.
However, Wadham has reaffirmed its faith in the old favourite, voting unanimously to acquire a new tortoise.
Wadham’s constitution specifies an integral role for the tortoise: “In the event that Wadham SU owns a living tortoise any tied vote amongst the SU will be resolved by the tortoise having the casting vote.
“The tortoise always votes for the motion due to his radical desire for change.”
However, the college’s tortoise chose to eschew its crucial legislative role several years ago when it escaped from its pen.
The motion put before the Wadham SU argued that “possession of a college tortoise would make the work of Wadham SU more efficient, and hence more effective” and that “possession of a college tortoise would create greater opportunities for community, collegiate glory and camaraderie.”
The motion also proposed that “possession of a college tortoise would be beneficial for the welfare of Wadham students, who we suggest would be able to play with the tortoise at an allocated time every week.”
Jahnavi Emmanuel, the Wadham SU president said the tortoise will “definitely be trained to race and we are looking to buy a medium-sized tortoise as these are supposedly the best racers – the other tortoises should get their game faces on for racing season.”
She was quick to dismiss rumours that Wadham’s famous party lifestyle will mean the tortoise could be too hung over to race.
She added “the tortoise will obviously have to be present at our fortnightly meetings on Sundays, so he won’t be hitting up No.9 on a regular basis, but I would expect to see him at Junction pretty often, though I’m not sure the VIP area of Camera will be his scene…”
However, one second year studying physics denied that Wadham was a party college, saying, ‘we’re not even allowed fireworks at our ball, probably because it’ll wake the tortoise”.
Harriet Soper, a tortoise enthusiast at Corpus Christi said the college’s tortoises don’t feel threatened by the newcomer to the racing scene: “Foxe and Oldham are very much in love and blind to all others of their kind.
“Nonetheless I can imagine this new acquisition could end up being a real SROC (Small Reptile on Campus) and will tear away into the distance like the proverbial hare.”
Former Corpus tortoise keeper Alex Coupe added “I am delighted that Wadham have got the tortoise, the only thing the tortoise has ever ‘taught us’ is the Chinese proverb ‘the wise man and the tortoise travel, but never leave their home’”.
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