Wednesday 29th April 2026
Blog Page 1785

LMH hold discussion on corrective therapy for homosexuals

After a turbulent LGBT History Month in Oxford, Lady Margaret Hall hosted a discussion on “corrective therapy” this Wednesday.

The event, entitled “Pray the Gay Away?” encouraged students to “Hear from two men who’ve tried and failed” the controversial practice, which seeks to rid homosexuals of homoerotic desires.

The discussion focused on the experiences of two individuals described by organisers as having a “fascinating personal connection with the issue.”

The first, Patrick Strudwick, was a “multi-award-winning journalist and columnist,” who famously authored an exposé of corrective therapy in the Independent. His reporting led to a high-profile case in which his “therapist” was found guilty of professional malpractice.

The second speaker was an administrative worker in the University who had “experienced corrective therapy for 2 years in his late twenties.” Both he and Strudwick discussed their personal experiences with the practice, and focused in particular on the “impact” it had on their lives.

A representative of the LMH event noted that both speakers offered “a unique perspective on the topic,” adding, “Patrick Strudwick approached the practice with the view of exposing how this ‘therapy’ is offered in the UK. His ground-breaking reporting led to a greater awareness of the practice and its prevalence despite the fact that it’s been banned by the main accreditation agencies.”

He continued, “Our second speaker turned to his Church pastor when he was in his twenties and in need of reassurance and support towards his sexuality. Instead he was subjected to two years of ‘corrective therapy’ which left a profound effect on his life.”

The issue of corrective therapy has been the cause of much controversy this term, after it emerged that Exeter College was to host an event run by Christian Concern, a group which advocates such therapy.

Owen Alun John, an LMH undergraduate behind the event, was confident that the discussion would “give a voice to some who haven’t spoken yet – ordinary gay people who’ve been through this, first-hand.” He added that he hoped the event had exposed “what this practice really involves – the exploitation of vulnerable people by reinforcing negative feelings towards their sexuality.”

Alun John explained the “aim” behind the event as a desire to “debunk the corrective therapy myth by offering a unique opportunity to hear directly from two men who’ve been through it.” He also noted that it had the full support of all members of the college, stating, “The event had unanimous support in college, from the Principal herself through to ordinary JCR and MCR members.”

He continued, “We’ve heard a lot in the University and national media recently from those who promote and practice this discredited ‘therapy;’ they’ve shared their pseudoscience and outright lies about how this practice is a great thing, has no harmful effects, and is just what many lonely and closeted gay Christians need.”

He concluded, “This ‘therapy’ doesn’t make you happy or healthy, and as the Royal College of Psychiatrists has held, it is a “deeply damaging” experience with “no evidence of success””.
Caspar Bullock, a first year student at LMH, described the event as a “fascinating” and “much needed discussion,” adding, “It’s great that LMH have been able to host such an event and have welcomed two speakers who both shared very personal experiences.”

The event was funded by LMH JCR and SCR following a unanimous decision in favour of the motion during last week’s JCR meeting.

Protest sleep-outs attract crowds at the Rad Cam

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Students have staged a protest at the Radcliffe Camera to show solidarity to the growing numbers of homeless asylum seekers in the UK.

Around 40 members of Amnesty International and Student Action for Refugees (STAR) slept rough on the lawn of the Rad Cam on Saturday.

This was part of an action week organized by a wider campaign, Still Human Still Here, which is a coalition of over 50 organisations who campaign to improve the treatment of asylum seekers, and have a nationwide action week in February each year.

Organizer of the Amnesty/STAR sleepout Joe Shields  explained, “Our main aim is for the government to allow asylum seekers to get a job if their case has not been resolved after six months.”

Other objectives of the Still Human Still Here group include providing the right degree of protection for asylum seekers as well as free healthcare. Shields continued, “Even when the UK grants asylum seekers refugee status they are refused the right to work and have to survive on £5 a day. Some are not given refugee status even though it is judged that it is unsafe for them to return home. With no other option these refused asylum seekers have to live on the streets with no support.”

In light of this, some students have taken their solidarity movement further and attempted to live on £5 a day.

Sarah Pine, a protester at the Rad Cam, said, “Refugees are treated as criminals. They are given no right to work, no certainty to remain and no chance of a future. It is no surprise that such high numbers of asylum seekers end up on the streets.”

Tilly Hill, a second year at St. Anne’s who also protested at the Rad Cam, said, “Media coverage of the issues surrounding asylum is largely negative; little attention is paid to the adversity and hardships experienced by asylum seekers. I think it’s really important to speak out on behalf of those whose voices are not often heard, draw attention to the problems and push for these changes.”

Brasenose college student Emma Plews commented, “The Rad Cam was a great location and lots of people stopped by to ask why we were there so hopefully we’ve spread the message a bit further.”

The protests come in the wake of studies revealing that the number of homeless people in the UK has risen by over a fifth and, of this number, over half are non-UK nationals.
Campsfield House, an Immigration Removal Centre 6 miles out of Oxford city centre, has been the target of an 18 year long campaign, called ‘Close Campsfield.’

There are 216 inmates at Campsfield House. Asylum seekers, or those seeking this status, are held there without charge and without proper access to legal representation for an indefinite period of time. According to Amnesty International, this is a serious breach of internationally recognized human rights.

‘Close Campsfield’ describes Campsfield House as a “prison.” Its closure has also been called by local trade unions, the Oxford & District Trades Union Council, student, faith and human rights organisations.

According to the Close Campsfield website, in 1998 the Oxford Mail said that “Campsfield is an abomination to human rights in that it presumes guilt from the outset.”

Bill Mackeith, spokesperson for Close Campsfield, said, “In 2002, the Home Secretary announced that he would close Campsfield because it was ‘not fit for the 21st century’. He reversed that announcement after the 14 February 2002 fire at Yarl’s Wood created an unplanned reduction in detention places.”

Members of STAR have been going to these protests by bike and bus for the last few months and, according to STAR member Rebecca Sparrow, “hopefully will continue to do so.”

Disgruntled applicant makes 40 FOI requests

Oxford University chiefs have noted that there are problems with current Freedom of Information laws, after being inundated with over 40 requests for information about a course from a failed applicant.

The University told a Parliamentary inquiry into FoI that the Freedom of Information Act provided insufficient protection from ‘vexatious’ requests such as the one by this student.
Oxford remarked that this case demonstrates that FOI laws, which ensure the public has the right to access information held by public authorities, should change.

A University spokesperson stated, ‘A lot of the current problems come from how many people use FoI to go on ‘fishing expeditions’ rather than making carefully considered and specific requests.’

The University received 330 FoI requests in 2011, compared to just 185 in 2005 when the Freedom of Information Act came into force. The spokesperson noted that just under a third of all requests have come from student journalists, with other requesters being the national press, special interest groups or ordinary members of the public.

However they stated that these requests can often appear trivial, commenting, ‘People should bear in mind that FoI uses up University resources and that material very similar to their request is often already publically available online.’

Merton College Dphil student Chong Chen disagreed with the university’s stance, saying, ‘I don’t see how this extreme example is a well-grounded reason to change the system. Honestly, I don’t even see 330 requests as a lot to handle.’ He added that the most requests are probably honest, and that this angry applicant was probably just a ‘nutter.’

First year PPEist Angus Barry agreed, stating, ‘My impression is that FoIs have done a lot of good and it would be difficult to change the laws about them to accurately remove those which are just wasting time.’

Law student Abigail Bridger added, ‘[Vexatious requests] are an inconvenience, but a trivial one compared to the other things that the Freedom of Information laws protect.’

45 year old competes to row for Oxford

A 45 year old Oxford student could compete in the 2012 Varsity boat race.

James Ditzell, an Australian and a masters student at Pembroke college where he studies Management, competed on behalf of his home country at the under-23 world championships in 1989 before many of his team-mates were even born; the rest of the team are comparative youngsters, with an average age of just 23.7. The second oldest is Justin Webb at 30 years old.

The President of the squad, Karl Hudspith, told Cherwell, “When James arrived on the first day it surprised me to see someone so old having a go at trialling for the blue boat. Initially I didn’t think he would last long, but he surprised us all by pulling a very impressive ergo score in the first week, beating many who were half his age.”

He continued, “Unfortunately age does have a cost, and an untimely rib injury that kept him off the water for six weeks dealt a big blow to his selection chances. However, even if James is not in one of the crews on race day, he has shown great character and determination to last the whole way through the season and complete the training program.”

Rowing is a notoriously demanding sport, requiring power as well as endurance, and can be challenging for more senior athletes. However, the maintenance of a good level of training can keep older competitors at their peak for far longer than previously thought.

Were Ditzell to be chosen to compete in the final team of eight, he would set a new record for the oldest rower to compete in the Varsity Boat race in the history of its 158 contests. The record is currently held by Mike Wherley, an Oxford student who competed at the age of 36 in 2008. The oldest overall competitor is  Andy Probert, who coxed for Cambridge at 38 years old in 1992.

The race will take place on the River Thames on April 7th 2012.

Pembroke burns with pride

Pembroke Boat Club burned their boat on Wednesday as part of the traditional celebrations for winning Torpids.

Pembroke’s first Men’s Eight bumped the Christchurch on the first day of Torpids and maintained headship throughout the four-day competition.

The captain of the Pembroke boat, Austin Elwood, commented that it had been an “exceptional effort by the team.” When asked about the tradition of the burning of the boat, he said that it was something that “could only happen in Oxford.”

The Pembroke men’s crew last got to the Head of the River in 2009, but they were bumped before the end of the competition. Several rowers from the 2009 crew came to watch this year’s men succeed. Both male and female Pembroke crews also qualified to represent Oxford at the Henley Boat Races where they will compete against the fastest college boats from Cambridge.

The burning of the boat took place at 6.30pm on Wednesday in Pembroke’s North Quad. Around 100-200 people turned up to watch the traditional ceremony with one Pembroke finalist commenting, “It was an incredible thing to watch. I felt so proud.”

Preview: Out Through the In Door

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I only wish I could tell you more of Alex Mill’s play itself. From what I can tell, I only saw about three pages of the script, some of which was still in its blocking phase and, owing to the Beckettesque-Pinteresque nature of the play, at the best of times deliberately disjointed and meaningless. There are only two cast members, neither of whom have names, separated by a red door and a mysterious third character, played in fact by the director, whose presence is never explained. I am told to ‘expect verbal fencing’ and  ‘disquisition upon holidays, stars, swings, storytelling and porridge, with something much more menacing just beyond’. Not that this makes things any clearer of course. 

Yet, this is part of the charm of the show. Out Through the In Door is a play about the rhythmic qualities and poetry of words in their every day use, and it’s something that Marc Pacitti and Mick Lyons, who play the two characters, are well on their way to demonstrating able to command of, as long as their don’t let their accents get in the way. Alex Mills is an intriguing director with a very eclectic musical taste. He interspersed the rehearsal by playing different songs from his iPod, in one instance to help his performers focus, in another, to help with find the rhythm in the script. It’s a wonderful idea and one that rendered nuanced and absorbing performances from the actors in the rehearsal, even if I didn’t quite know what was going on all of the time.

If all this mystère is some clever marketing trick, the person responsible for it needs a rather large pat on the back, for it has certainly worked on me, and I hope it will also work on you. 

3.5 stars

Review: Rubber Dinghy

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For a play where two men argue over their past lives whilst sitting in an inflatable boat, Rubber Dinghy, written by Kelvin Fawdrey and directed by Ben Cohen, packs a surprisingly remarkable punch.

For a start, it only runs at half an hour long. I probably shouldn’t admit to this but the show’s length is half the reason I like it so much. Short plays often have a tendency not to reveal enough of their characters, or not to give suitably satisfactory endings, simply because of the time frame. However, Fawdrey’s witty and intelligent script trims all the fat, trusts it’s audience’s intelligence, and says exactly what it needs to say in 30 minutes, what many a student play has said in 60.  

Ben Cohen is an audacious and confident director. It’s a gamble having a random musician sitting on stage in full sub fusc, banging drums, splashing water and playing various bizarre looking instruments into a microphone to recreate the sea and other sound effects, but it works perfectly. Equally as effective is the juxtaposition between the natural lighting of most scenes, and then the sudden washes of deep colour; a rich blue when the Siren appears and a menacing red when a flare gun is shot in the final scenes. It all adds to the really quite unsettling disjointed menace of the piece.

Credit must also go Edwin Price and Alexander Bowsher who both give strong central performances, as well as Eleanor Budge who has never made the song Blue Moon so evocative and chilling. The true test of a good performer on stage is whether they can say as much with silence and stilness as they do with words. These three succeed with flying colours.

All in all, I can barely fault Rubber Dinghy. Go see it. It’s a hot contender for best show of the term.

 

4 stars. 

Review: Andy Eastwood, Holywell

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‘So who here remembers the war years?’

This was not the first clue that this concert might not be aimed at my demographic. As soon as I had entered the Holywell music rooms, I noticed the elevated age of most around me, and realised that my expectations of a cool, alternative ukulele gig would be challenged.

Really, I shouldn’t have been surprised; Andy Eastwood, the uke virtuoso the whole night was based around, is a paid-up member of the Vaudeville and variety traditions, and as such his act is a bit more ‘end-of-the-pier’ than the internet ukulele musicians I’m used to. However, despite my initial disappointment I soon got into the swing of things, helped along by Andy’s boundless and infectious enthusiasm. The amount of energy that he put into the first half was phenomenal, every song infused with the potency of a closing number and with a sideline in cheesy jokes that never fell flat, no matter how truly groansome they were. While a few of his Formby covers left me cold, his medleys of Elvis tracks and film themes (nothing later than the early 80s) really appealed to me, and certainly got a great reception from the crowd.

Of course, while I may have had some issues with the music genre, Eastwood’s pedigree as a musician is beyond question. Whilst at New College, he was the first music student in Oxford’s history to perform his finals recital on the ukulele, going some way to redeem the image of an instrument that many dismiss out of hand. Watching him play was a joy (as it is with any truly gifted musician), and his skill was often genuinely astonishing. A particular highlight for me was a version of the William Tell overture which came towards the end of the first half – honestly, it’s something that needs to be seen to be believed, and it’s a real shame that his set didn’t contain more adaptations in that vein. Instead, Eastwood demonstrated his versatility by performing a few songs on the guitar, and even more on the violin. While this did serve to break up the ukulele songs a bit, and Eastwood is accomplished in both of these instruments, these sections seemed to fall slightly flat. Andy’s remarkability lies in his primary instrument, and his lesser skill on the others meant that it did not justify the diversion.

The second half, unfortunately, seemed to lack a lot of the energy of the first, and there were far fewer songs that I could identify. By the time Andy and his band had started their patriotic 1940s medley, my mind had begun to wander. Overall, while I had a good time, I was slightly disappointed. But that’s really not fair on Eastwood; his technique was flawless, and while I may not have been his target audience I still found plenty to appreciate. Fundamentally, my flawed expectations are to blame for my reaction, with most of the audience seeming to have a fantastic time. In any case, I have a lot of respect for someone who wears their passions on their sleeve, someone who’ll stand up to play in front of a crowd no matter how silly their instrument is seen as. To steal one of Eastwood’s puns – it takes some pluck.

Review: Gotye – Making Mirrors

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Over the past few weeks, apparently from nowhere, Gotye (pronounced ‘Gautillier’), the stage name of Belgian born Australian experimentalist musician Wouter De Backer, has stealthily climbed the UK charts with his song ‘Somebody I Used to Know’, the lead single from Making Mirrors. Despite the success of the single, the success of this, his third album, is hindered by two simply unavoidable problems. The first of these being the wide range of differing styles which the album contains, the second being the brilliance of that flagship single, ‘Somebody I Used to Know’.

You might be forgiven for thinking that a good song would be to the benefit of an album as a whole, but this is certainly not the case in this instance. The album features songs ranging from the upbeat Motown-inspired ‘I Feel Better’ to the slower, electronic sounds of ‘State of the Art’, which is apparently a song about pipe organs. Whilst experimentalism of this kind should be encouraged, the disparate styles on display on Making Mirrors means that the album exhibits a severe lack of coherence with it sometimes being difficult to believe that you are still listening to the same artist from song to song.

If, then, there is no coherence, which there isn’t, the album must rely on the strength of its individual songs for its success, and this is where the colossus that is ‘Somebody I Used to Know’ really shoots its parent in the foot. The song contains its own compelling storyline of lost love and everything it sets out to achieve is achieved. Although the other songs on the album are by no means poor – ‘Eyes Wide Upon’, ‘Save Me’ and ‘Bronte’ are all well worth a listen – they are nowhere near the standard of ‘Somebody I Used to Know’, to the extent that the listener cannot help but be left wondering why they should bother with them at all.

3 STARS

Interview: Hopsin

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In 2004, Marcus Hopson dropped out of high school in Los Angeles, determined to become a rapper. With an ‘eight dollar microphone from Wal-Mart,’ do-it-yourself beat-making software and a pair of white contact lenses, he took to his parents’ basement to start a rap career from scratch. Eight years, two albums, and a nationwide tour later, having ditched his record deal to go it alone, the self-styled ‘rap maniac with the hooligan eyes’ is finally on the brink of superstardom. ‘It’s going really good,’ Hopsin tells me, in his first UK interview. ‘In my particular situation, it’s probably going as good as it could get, you know. Everything’s nice right now.’

It reads like the classic hip-hop rags-to-riches story. Notably absent from the narrative, however, are the usually (assumed to be) attendant tropes of glorified violence, gang allegiance and drug-taking, Marcus eschewing the violent glamour of South Central LA for the subterranean home comforts of his basement laboratory. Given the location of his early career, it is perhaps appropriate that, on a cold Christmas vacation night, I am calling California from my bedroom in my parents’ house. ‘How was your interview with the rapper?’ my mother will ask me later.

Despite a certain witty bravado, Hopsin’s lyrics are far from the self-hagiography that has come to be endemic in modern rap music. While not shy about proclaiming himself the ‘saviour’ of hip-hop, the self-promotion seems limited to a fairly undeniable musical talent. On an autobiographical level his songs tell the tale of ‘the Special Ed kid at lunchtime the bitches wouldn’t stand around with’, masturbating at his parents’ house or ‘sitting alone with my Capri Sun and raisins’ in the playground. While not necessarily in the way his teachers might have hoped, Hopsin’s schooldays were certainly formative years.

‘I was in high school and I didn’t really do too much work,’ he explains, ‘but it wasn’t because I was lazy. It was just because it wasn’t what I really wanted to do in my heart. I wanted to skateboard, I wanted to draw and I wanted to make music. I saw other people who made livings off of those so I thought, ‘Why can’t I?’ This is what I want to do and school has nothing for me.’

At times, the 26-year-old Hopsin seems to channel the 16 year old Marcus, and a natural switch to present tense in recalling his past fosters the called-to-principal’s-office dynamic: ‘It’s not that I’m lazy and I wanna be rebellious but they don’t have nothing for me, so fuck it! They have me here for nothing so I’m gonna throw tantrums in class ‘cos I don’t care!’

Growing up, both in terms of pushing past negative experiences at school, and overcoming restricting cultural pigeonholes, was important. ‘I was brainwashed,’ he says, when asked about the pressure to conform to a stereotypical West-Coast ‘thug’ or ‘gangsta’ image. ‘I was thinking in the box, thinking West-Coast rappers had to be West-Coast rappers and East-Coast rappers had to be East-Coast rappers. But then as you get older, and you start to find yourself as a man, that doesn’t matter. I am me, and I know how to rap, and if people like my music they’re just gonna like it. It doesn’t matter where I’m from. So that thankfully got eliminated once I started becoming a real adult.’

The West-Coast streets that raised Marcus were not those of Long Beach or Compton, but those of Panorama City, known less for its hip-hop credentials than for being the filming location of The Office. It is also, according to Wikipedia, ‘known as the San Fernando Valley’s first planned community,’ and this is perhaps an appropriate location for the start of a career in which it seems that from day one, nothing has left been to chance.

‘Everything that I’m doing is planned,’ he insists, ‘There’s not really any accidents.’ Always autonomous in the production of his music, and now, after an acrimonious split from Eazy-E’s Ruthless Records in 2009, the head of his own label, Hopsin’s outlook is fiercely independent. ‘People think that I’m just a rapper, and they assume that most rappers don’t do everything, but I do everything,’ he stresses.

‘From the beats to the videos to working on my image to doing my choruses, everything is planned out. I know the majority of rappers don’t do that ‘cos I see rappers every freakin’ night damn near when I’m at a show, and I know what they do and they don’t do. 

‘A rapper may feel like they can beat me in a battle or competition, which realistically they could. I’m not the best rapper. But there’s not many full packages out there in the world.’

Searching for a metaphor, the teenage Marcus once again resurfaces. ‘It’s kind of like the Dragonballs in Dragonball Z. There’s only seven of them in the world,’ he explains with an endearingly goofy, Comic-Con chuckle, ‘Those Dragonballs – that’s how I feel good, high quality artists are in general: there’s not many of them. There’s a lot of rappers, but those super full packages, there’s not a lot of them.’

Making full use of the internet, turning makeshift home videos into YouTube sensations and gathering Facebook fans at an exponential rate, Hopsin is a living lesson in the creative opportunities available to young people doing it on their own.

‘That’s the message that I wanna give to everybody. I want them to stop being lazy, stop depending on people, stop saying ‘Oh I need a manager! Oh I don’t have anybody to make my beats.’ I didn’t have that either. I was the king of not having that. I didn’t have anything at all. I had to get up and learn how to do everything that I didn’t want to learn! I didn’t wanna make beats! I didn’t wanna learn how to do videos! I didn’t wanna learn how to mix stuff! But if I didn’t learn that then I’d be 26 years old right now just chilling here being a bum, and probably have a kid and be hating my life. You gotta get up and do something.’

It was on YouTube that Hopsin first started to turn British heads this summer with the final instalment of his ‘Ill Mind of Hopsin’ video series, part State of the Union address, part manifesto for the future of rap. In a whirlwind tour of what’s wrong with the rap industry, the ‘wack beats and gap teeth’ of Tyler, the Creator, at the time the Biggest Thing in Rap, were singled out for special scrutiny. I suggest he’s not afraid to speak his mind about other rappers.

‘No I don’t have a problem with speaking my mind at all,’ he retorts. ‘I hear hundreds of people say crap about all these other rappers, and I’m one of those people too, who talk crap about rappers, about the garbage that’s on the radio and this and that, but I rap so I can actually voice my opinion on a song.’ 

It’s clearly a battleground that he relishes.

‘There’s people who give their opinions about me as well: people saying, ‘Hopsin’s wack, he bites Eminem, his contacts are ugly…’ But a lot of people who say those things don’t rap, and if they did rap they could diss me as well and do the same thing to me.’

As the head of his own label, Funk Volume, Hopsin is well placed to discuss rap as a business, as well as an art form, and behind the contacts, there is always an eye to the industry as a whole. As well as the digs at individual rappers and their music, the standard model of the ‘hip-hop lifestyle’ – the women, the drugs, and ‘all these songs about cash’ – is comprehensively contested.

‘I can’t knock somebody for making money,’ he clarifies, ‘That’s a good thing. They can support themselves financially and that’s good. It’s the way that they promote it. These rappers promote money, they promote drinking, they promote smoking, they promote strippers and all that stuff; all these things that don’t really play any real serious part in really, really actually living and finding happiness. These are things that only contribute to you being older and thinking, ‘Why the hell did I do that? What the hell was I thinking? Oh my God, I’m such an idiot.’

It’s a standpoint that you might argue is easy to take when such luxuries are out of financial reach. But even now that Hopsin is making ‘pretty good money’ – although ‘not a millionaire or nothing’ – he has so far not been overcome by temptation.

‘I walk in the mall and I’m like, ‘What do I want?’ None of that stuff is really going to make me happy. When I finally made enough money to buy a new car I was like, ‘I don’t even want it!’ It was like, ‘Why am I gonna get this shit?’ You start breaking things down like, ‘Why?’

‘If I buy this new car, what am I really buying it for? Am I buying it to impress girls? I already have a girlfriend. Am I buying it to impress my friends? Who cares about them, they know me for who I really am, what is this gonna really do?

‘Anybody who portrays money to be that way, is putting off false advertisement, and any rapper or any artist who has power to control minds, they need to know their responsibilities. 

Again, Hopsin finds his metaphor in the comic-book drawer. ‘It’s like in Spider-Man, Aunt May says with great power comes great responsibility… No, no, that could have been the uncle in Spider-Man. I forgot who said it but it was in Spider-Man… With great power comes great responsibility. So anybody who has the power to capture minds, they need to know that they have a responsibility and they can’t mislead people in the wrong direction. If they wanna do that, fuck it, go ahead, but I personally don’t feel that that’s right and I’m gonna fight for that.’

Does he feel he’s fighting alone?

‘I know there are others out there like me, but I don’t meet too many rappers like me, to be honest. I kind of do feel like I’m alone, but I don’t feel like I’m weak. It’s like I’m a one man army, but I have nuclear bombs in my backpack.’