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About the AuthorRemi Graves has published 18 articles
The punter's guide to procrastination
The sun is out, collections are over, and the prospect of prelims, mods or finals has not yet set in – for those of us who consider delusion to be our best friend that is. In my bid to wear off Trinity Term Stress – yes it does warrant capitalisation – punting has become my latest obsession. I've done it twice in the space of one week, and I just can't get enough. What I did notice however was the lack of suitable music pumping out of my fellow punters' iPod speakers. Here, then is the perfect playlist for those of you who like to take distraction during Trinity term very, very seriously. I like to call it the Punter's Guide to Procrastination. Lean back on those bright blue cushions, and let yourself be lulled into a false sense of security by the soothing melody of music intertwined with the sound of water lapping against your punt.
So first up is a song perfectly suited for those initial wobbly moments in the punt, people are scrambling to their seats and someone has reluctantly volunteered to do the actual punting. D'ebruit's Suave remix to Jamie Woon's 'Lady Luck' will quickly put you in the mood for exploration along the Cherwell river. The percussive insistence of this song, with its catchy handclaps and sampled bongo beats will get your energy levels peaking faster than any Tesco brand Red Bull rip-off. Just make sure you turn the bass down on this one as I nearly broke my speakers and burst my eardrums the first time I listened to it – don't say you weren't warned.
As giddy excitement is replaced by a slightly premature self-satisfaction and you glide peacefully down the river, why not accompany the pleasant change of mood with a real summer chill-out track: 'Millionaire' by Kelis ft Andre 3000. This noughties classic needs no introduction and I challenge you not to bob your head uncontrollably to the beat whilst wistfully remembering the days when Kelis' enchanting voice was enough to get her press coverage.
You've reached a dip in energy levels, the initial excitement at being the first to punt has really and truly disappeared. And whilst the fun mood has not been entirely deflated, no one else has volunteered to pick up that scarily long metal pole. So as you sit, being gently dragged downstream by the powers that be. I urge you to play 'Albatross' by Wild Beasts – the perfect track for wallowing in one's own self-pity. I might as well take this opportunity to plug the fact that we'll be reviewing their new album Smother in this Friday's issue and if you're super keen, its available to stream on Guardian right now, so get on it (once you've finished punting of course).
To bring you back from the brink of depression, and prevent you from jumping into the – somewhat shallow – river I suggest you pump out Starslinger's rework of 'Elizabeth Fraser' as loud as possible. Weird name I know but this electro resurrection of Cocteau Twins' ethereal sound really hits the spot with its hip hop cum dream pop influences, you'll be shimmying hard enough to get the boat rocking. Even if you won't know how to classify this song, you'll sure as hell enjoy it, just make sure no one is standing up...
Finally then, to round up the afternoon's punting I suggest going back to basics. This will be particular popular for those of you who don't enjoy electronoise or whatever the cool kids are calling it these days. I offer you none other than Ray Lamontagne's stunning 'All the Wild Horses'. His gravely yet seamless voice will be the perfect exit song for you and your mates as you regain dry land. The combination of strings and Ray's unforgettable vocals might make for quite an emotional end to your fun day on the river. Still you'll have beaten off another day's work and if that doesn't spark tears of joy (or disguised tears of panic) then I don't know what will.
Over and Out.