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College splashes out on plant pots

Brasenose has allegedly spent £18,000 on plants and plant pots emblazoned with the college’s iconic knocker as part of their quincentenary anniversary celebrations in 2009.

The quads of Brasenose have been littered with an array of plants and pots, though the flora and fauna are already withering and wilting in the cold. The Bursary refused to deny that they had spent the reported amount of money on plants and plant pots.

Students and staff alike expressed bemusement over the amount purportedly spent of the plant pots. One student remarked, “I was quite impressed to think that we were a college so satisfied and contented by our financial prowess that such a sum could be deemed viable.”

Members of the JCR were quick to suggest other ways in which college money could be spent. One finalist suggested, “hiring a boiler-man – or several at that price – to work out how to control temperature in the library – I go in there merely to perspire.”

Another student proposed “room improvements, student welfare, or a sizable contribution to our ever diminishing sports funds. They could even lower the price of college accommodation if that’s the excess of cash they’ve got lying around.”

 

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